I’ve written this post so many times because I can’t figure out whether I’m afraid of my future or not. One day I am afraid of what lies ahead for me and the next day I feel like I am strong enough to handle everything just fine.
The next major step of my illness is just around the corner so I’m trying to enjoy the things I can do. I know what lies ahead of me but if I concentrate on the things I can do maybe I won’t be afraid. So far and with so much help I’ve adjusted to my weaknesses so I’m sure I can do it to the end.
- My fingers are curling more each day causing me to type slower but I am still able to share my thoughts and stories which means the world to me right now.
- My right arm is getting weaker but thank goodness for two arms because my left arm helps to hold my right arm up so it can function more efficiently.
- My legs are no longer strong enough to let me walk alone and I can no longer sit or stand by myself but I have amazing escorts by my side to get me where I want to go.
- The muscles in my neck are getting weaker which makes my head wobble slightly and sometimes my head falls so instead of a fashionable scarf I am wearing a pretty blue neck brace. Mark has developed another procedure to lay me down gently to my pillow to avoid jarring my neck.
The more I think about it, the more I know I should not be afraid.